Posted by TJ on 7/29/2010Tags: Fun, Linked, TranslatingTranslating for ‘the Ballmer’

Speaking at Microsoft’s analyst day, CEO Steve Ballmer confessed Apple “sold more [iPads] than I’d like them to sell.”

Translation: Wow! how did we miss this boat?

He also says getting a slate computer done right is “one of the top issues on my mind.” He’s working with hardware partners to fine tune Windows 7 so it can work with slates and tablets.

Translation: Microsoft doesn’t have control of any of the hardware, and they are trying desperately to make Windows fit onto yet another type of hardware platform, which they do not control.

What will a Microsoft tablet look like? Well, Ballmer says we’ve “done a lot of work on ink and touch,” and he’d like to see those features integrated.

Translation: Don’t know, don’t care, we just want in this market!

“They will be shipping as soon as they are ready. It has job one urgency around here, nobody’s sleeping at this point,” says Ballmer. He adds, “we are working with those partners, not just to deliver something, but to deliver products that people really want to go buy.”

I really have no idea when these things are going to be ready.

While Ballmer was being humble, he also took a little shot at the iPad, saying “I don’t think there is one size that fits all…I’ve been to too many meetings with journalists who spent the first 10 minutes of the meeting setting up iPad to look like a laptop.”

(my mind just exploded at the very notion that someone thinks this man can be humble, but anyway)

Translation: You know I have to say something bad about the iPad, because it’s just incredible that we missed this and aren’t in this market!